darkness-matters:

Parent: What does a cow say?

Baby: Moo!

Parent: Yay!! What does a cat say?

Baby: Meow!

Parent: Great job! Now, what does a dog say?

Baby: *deep voice* Aoba

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gayalienbabe:

Cleo woke up with her tail between her paws and adorably disgruntled

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utopianoverlord:

When Stanley came to a set of two open doors, he entered the door on his left.

utopianoverlord:

When Stanley came to a set of two open doors, he entered the door on his left.
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grimelords:

Making out with a girl for the first time is the coolest thing and the second coolest thing is driving home and getting aware of all the parts of your face where she was and tasting her lip balm on your lips. The third coolest thing is outer space.

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child's therapist: your child has a mental disorder
parent: i'm supportive, understanding, and loving. i will do all i can to help my child.
child: i can't do this because my disorder makes it very hard.
parent: you're lazy
parent: you're immature
parent: get over it it's not that big of a deal
parent: grow up
parent: don't tell anyone about your disorder you should be ashamed of it
child: i'm insulted and i think your comments are abusive
parent: i've done nothing but support you with this!!!!
jeselacey:

✿ reasons to be ✿ songs about stars, the moon, any pretty sunset, and your favorite person. for heather || listen
→ And I sang oh, what do I do? What do I do without you?

01. young lion - vampire weekend 02. dearest - buddy holly 03. hands - moving mountains 04. loro - pinback 05. riches and wonders - the mountain goats 06. love and some verses - iron & wine 07. two headed boy, pt. 2 - neutral milk hotel 08. the suburbs (continued) - aracde fire 09. parachutes - coldplay 10. soco amaretto lime - brand new 11. woke up new - the mountain goats 12. car - built to spill 13. walls (tom petty cover) - kevin devine 14. reasons - built to spill 15. don’t panic - coldplay 16. farewell and goodnight - smashing pumpkins

jeselacey:

 reasons to be ✿ songs about stars, the moon, any pretty sunset, and your favorite person. for heather || listen

→ And I sang oh, what do I do? What do I do without you?

01. young lion - vampire weekend 02. dearest - buddy holly 03. hands - moving mountains 04. loro - pinback 05. riches and wonders - the mountain goats 06. love and some verses - iron & wine 07. two headed boy, pt. 2 - neutral milk hotel 08. the suburbs (continued) - aracde fire 09. parachutes - coldplay 10. soco amaretto lime - brand new 11. woke up new - the mountain goats 12. car - built to spill 13. walls (tom petty cover) - kevin devine 14. reasons - built to spill 15. don’t panic - coldplay 16. farewell and goodnight - smashing pumpkins

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